Everyone over the age of 45 knows exactly what’s wrong with Millenials.

They’re self-centered, unmotivated, not family focused or goal oriented and have absolutely no respect for older generations.

And that’s a whole stack of misconceptions you’d better be prepared to toss out when you meet Kaci Farrar.

She has an undergraduate degree and two graduate degrees, has worked grueling jobs in social services and home health, recently completed an intensive classroom and infield training program to earn her nursing home administrator’s license and was hired as Countrywood Assisted Living Center’s newest director.

She balances all that with a busy family life with husband Tanner and nearly 20-month-old son Maddox and a serious chronic illness that has already resulted in multiple major surgeries.

And did we mention she’s only 29?

“I’m right where I want to be,” Farrar said. “I feel so blessed.”

Listening to Farrar’s story, you soon realize that fate and faith may have helped open some doors, but it’s her own dogged determination and dedicated work ethic that walked her across those thresholds.

She grew up in Hinton and graduated from high school at Hydro-Eakly. She met her husband Tanner Farrar while she was an undergraduate at Southwestern Oklahoma State University.

She was barely back from her honeymoon when she was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease, a type of inflammatory bowel disorder that can result in serious and permanent intestinal damage.

During the worst of her illness, which required a series of corrective surgeries, she completed two graduate degrees, including an MBA and a master’s in healthcare management, moved with her husband to Kingfisher in 2014 and dove into jobs not for the faint of heart, first in child protective services and then in marketing with Encompass Health, where she found her passion in working with the elderly.

“Countrywood is one of the locations where I would do inservice and provide extra education and extra support,” she said. “I was in here two or three times a week and fell in love with the residents.

“I became so invested in the success of their care and loved the staff here as well.”

Farrar also believed she had leadership skills to offer that weren’t being utilized in her home health marketing job.

So nearly two years into that position, Farrar decided she wanted to go back to school again and get her license in nursing home administration.

After taking a few months at home with her son, who was less than a year old, Farrar started classes last January, eventually completing six months of classwork and a 560-hour supervised administrator-in-training program.

She had only two or three “dream jobs” in mind, and the Country-wood position was at the top of her short list.

“About six weeks before I was scheduled to take my licensing exam, the director’s position opened up here,” Farrar said. “I put in my application, but I didn’t have my license and they hired someone from Edmond.”

Farrar was heartbroken, but then the newly-hired director moved on a few weeks later when he was offered a job closer to his home.

“That happened five days before I took my licensing test, then I passed my exam, got my license and put my application back in,” she said.

Then, thanks to a serendipitous encounter with two Countrywood executives in an impromptu after-hours visit at the center – an opportunity she took advantage of by extolling the virtues of hiring someone whose significant ties to the community would make her more accountable to residents and their families – Farrar was called in for an interview.

Two more interviews and “a whole mess of paperwork” later, the job was hers.

And since her Aug. 19 start date, Farrar’s life has not been the same.

“The change has been immense in that amount of time,” she said. “Our staffing is up 40 or 50 percent and I’m now interviewing for upper management and have really good applicants for those positions.”

Farrar has worked to broaden the center’s focus to give more attention to family members as well as residents.

“Caregiver burnout is very real and I try to be as much of a support to the residents’ families as I possibly can and I’m teaching staff to do the same,” she said. “It’s not just about who’s under our roof. Their family is an extension of that. The clinicians here have been so receptive to that idea.”

She’s also cognizant of the duty she owes to Countrywood’s memory care patients.

“A memory care coordinator is one of the jobs I am in the process of filling. We have the only secured memory care complex in town and I feel compelled to give them more attention and more activities specific to their disease process.”

That attention has involved small changes – like serving food and beverages in bright green containers since green is often the last color dementia patients can distinguish and seasoning food to tempt them to eat it.

And it’s involved looking for ways that memory care and assisted living residents can “thrive together.”

For that, Farrar has turned to the outside community to find volunteers willing to share their gifts. Activities being offered or considered include quilting classes, floral design, line dancing and chair yoga.

Arecentwestern-themed program written and emceed by resident and retired school teacher Mona Prickett proved to be an excellent opportunity to encourage community involvement.

“We had over 100 people in attendance, 12 nursing students from CTTC (Chisholm Trail Technology Center) came to help and were amazing and three other community members donated enough decorations for us to decorate from one end of this place to the other,” she said.

“Everyone wants to support our residents here but they aren’t sure how to do it. When we create those opportunities, the results are amazing.”

But above everything else, it’s the residents themselves who motivate Farrar to not only put in the hours it takes to do her job, but come back in the evenings and every weekend, usually accompanied by little Maddox, who’s quickly become a Countrywood fan favorite.

Farrar usually can be found on those extracurricular visits sitting on a loveseat in an animated conversation with one of the residents while Maddox races the hallways to offer a cheerful greeting at each door.

“The residents here are amazing. They’ve lived these big adventurous lives, purposeful lives. We want to make sure they stay purposeful,” she said, wiping a tear as she warms to her favorite subject.

“We’re not here to do a job. We’re here to make a difference.”